Phat Mack Eyeballs The Flicks

Proud Mary You didn't see any guns: check. Gang wars: Fall guys. Bad people: check. Downtown Foxy Brown: two-gunning like Leon Lai. Hennessy: must we have these stereotypes? Plot: Not much sense. Needed: cliche-free script. "If you love me": "Let me go." "Don't turn your back on me, woman": "Don't you walk away from me!" Could have been better written by: a Tweet bot. To the rescue: Tina Turner. Special Blaxploitation Scoring: 12" Afros: none. 'Fro picks: none. Nik Nik shirts: none. Leather trench coats: none. High-waisted bell-bottoms: none. Once I stopped waiting for it to get good, I sat back and enjoyed watching it . Wait for network TV, then check it out.

  Black Panther Hot chicks: With spears and shaved heads. EMS: Bad guys; tattoos; superpowers. Dancing: Let the Challenge Begin! Q: High School girl invents sneakers. Let the refugees in: To South Korea? Piper Cub: Seoul => Johannesburg VFR. Let The Challenge Begin II! Fight Scenes: Surreal, stylized, silly. Focus puller: Uncredited. It kept my attention after the first fifteen minutes. Wait for the dollar movies, then check it out. Caveat: I don't really like supermovies unless they're sendups. This one was probably in the upper quartile of the few I've seen. I liked the villain, Ullyses, and kept rooting for him. If they made a movie about him, I'd tough it out and go see it.

You Were Never Really Here Category -- Killers & Kids: Whoops, wrong thread. (stolen) Music: dystopian. I need: my space. Sound: Brutal. Flashbacks: Very artistic, I'm sure, but unresolved. Score! Next time, don't make me wait. Stomach wound: Here, have a pill. Psycho: another remake. Doll house: Telltale Heart. Plot: Unraveled but never ravels. I didn't like this flick when I saw it last night, but woke up this morning thinking that I may have brought too much baggage to it. Some of you might like it. If you think you might: check it out.

Wick 3 It always rains: In New York City! New York Public Library: Spoiler: Allows patrons to re-shelve their own books! Walt Coogan: Played by John Wick! Audi TT: One horsepower! Horse Fu; Comanche Fu! Morticia Adams: Played by John Wick! Same suit: Different continent! Finally: Belly Dancers! Rick Blaine: Played by John Wick! A girl: and her dog! Sit!: Jerry Robinson's revenge! Omar Sharif: Played by Ricardo Montalban! Sushi Fu; Flip Phone Fu; Laurence Fishburne Fu! Everything I hoped it would be... Spoiler: ...some of the stunt-dog scenes had me gasping and rising up out of my seat... ...a masterpiece of a shooter game brought to the screen without the shooter game first! Check it out! Spoiler: To be continued!!!

Upgrade Google Car: HAL 9000. The Six Million Dollar Man: A boy's best friend is his mother. Crutches: Throw them away. He's got a knife: We've got a knife, too. Bot on Bot violence: check. Drone Fu, Google Car Fu, Implant Fu, Blade Runner Fu, Baby Hitler Fu: check. Cross, double cross, double-double cross. Would have been better as a dark comedy, but that train has left the station. Worth checking out, but OK to wait for TV.

Uncut Gems Ethiopia: Chosen People! KG: Don't lean on the glass! Sports bettors: R U wet? I never placed a bet with that money!: No touching! What were you selling? Your hot [NSFW]? It was not nice: What you did to me! Sports bettors: Sure, they slow down the game, but they hate money! Bad Beat:      Spoiler:           I spent Xmas watching a movie about a hoops junkie!      Suck-out:            Spoiler:                 Not a bad little flick! Check it out!

 Terminator: Geriatrics a.k.a Terminator: Dark Fate Problems with static electricity: Please use proper grounding! Snowplows in Mexico City: check. Obligatory Junkies in a drugstore scene: check. Mifune/Musashi flyswatter scene: check. Mother Mary: comes to me! The wooded hills of Laredo: check. I can change diapers efficiently and I am extremely funny: check. Potato chips: Internet of ****! Aerial delivery: Saves the day! Noche de los Muertos: Terrible mess to clean up! Much better than you are expecting it to be. Ahnold and Sarah acquit themselves well, and there are enough young people to keep the movie regular. Check it out.