Proud Mary LR+ LM-

-

Proud Mary


You didn't see any guns: check.

Gang wars: Fall guys.

Bad people: check.

Downtown Foxy Brown: two-gunning like Leon Lai.

Hennessy: must we have these stereotypes?

Plot: Not much sense.

Needed: cliche-free script.

"If you love me": "Let me go."

"Don't turn your back on me, woman": "Don't you walk away from me!"

Could have been better written by: a Tweet bot.

To the rescue: Tina Turner.

Special Blaxploitation Scoring:

12" Afros: none.

'Fro picks: none.

Nik Nik shirts: none.

Leather trench coats: none.

High-waisted bell-bottoms: none.


Once I stopped waiting for it to get good, I sat back and enjoyed watching it. Wait for network TV, then check it out.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Kizu Monogatari 1, 2 and 3

-
Image
Kizu   Monogatari  1, 2 and 3 Best Line: "Why are you rubbing your cheek against my stomach so dearly?" Runner Up: "And why is my school uniform ripped?" Honorable Mention: "If I can't die for their sake, I don't call a person a friend." Gruesome Grisly Carnage: Check. Trigger Warning : Big Boobs with a 12 year-old face. Trigger Warning : Big Boobs with a 500 year-old face. Boob Fu: I've waited 35 years to write that. Vampires: Check. Trigger Warning : Japanese Teen Love. Kiss Shot: Pure killer, but not in a pool hall. Zonker: Shows his dark side. Sora Nagihara: Comes very close to showing up in the final scene. But doesn't. Trigger Warning : Frustration is a key element of Japanese adolescent erotica. Weird manga graphics that switch back and forth between representational and ideographic styles: Check. Extremely interesting and extremely entertaining (the audience was gasping and howling in places), and in the end, completely incomprehens
Read more

Solo LM

-
Image
Solo Bowery Boys: Steal a space ship. Hot Rods & Hot Babes: check. The Defiant Ones: Chewie's big chance at an Oscar! Saved by: Woody, where nobody knows your name. The Great Monorail Robbery!: check. Ruh-roh: pirates! Party scene with weird robots: check. Hot Rod Babe: is back! Robot Wars: no longer politically correct. Bar scene with weird aliens; poker scene with call & raise: check. Wookiee Liberation Army: check. 20,000 Leagues Under the: Gravity Well. Pirates again: Road Warriors. Mad Max: The Little Red-Haired Girl. Chewie: always has to carry the luggage. Wtf? "I'm yours." Great. Too much mushy stuff but otherwise a really fun flick. As good as (no, better than) any Star Wars movie. Check it out. 
Read more

Last Jedi +/+

-
Image
Last Jedi Warning: This is only the second Star Wars flick I've seen. I may have had some trouble figuring out who the characters were, but eventually got it all straight. Opening title crawl: check. Rebels: check, but alas, no monuments. Phone pranks: check (the kids love phone pranks). "Dreadnaughts" & "Bombs Away!": check. Darth Vader: now played by Adam Driver. Pescatarian Jedi: Played by Luke Skywalker. Mark Hamill: now played by Orson Welles in his greatest role. Washed-up has-been Jedi: played superbly by Mark Hamil. Young Luke: now a girl named Rey. Intergender violence: Carrie Fisher. Rey and Luke: get in a light saber fight in the rain (but not sexy). Then: Rey goes to the Death Star (I never figured out why). Then: Rey and Adam Driver and Smeagol get in a light saber fight. I think maybe Rey won. Then: some other stuff happens. Then: Rey is on the Millennium Falcon with Chewbacca (I missed the part that explained how). Filmies: some beautiful matc
Read more